Sunday, 2 December 2012

A love note: from me to you

A love at the wrong time.
All the words left unspoken.
Chances never taken.
If you are given the chance to turn the hands of time,
Would you have done differently?
And change fate.

But what if it never works out even after you did?
Would you rather have that one chance to know
Than spend your life wondering.........

                                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Today, you said it's final. You're getting married. What am I supposed to say? Tell you don't go ahead? What right do I have? You don't know I love you. And as much as I can tell you feel the same way, we never really said it out loud. Too many what ifs.... a thousand if onlys.. Nothing resolved. Ours is a love that won't get the light of day. It just cannot be.

I was weak kneed, too devastated by the news. I bit my lip to stop myself from trembling. As tears were threatening to fall down my cheeks, I can't make you wonder why. But they're burning my eyes. Part of me was happy for you but part of me just died upon hearing it. I lost all reasons to live. I was praying for strength to get through this. It took all I have not to blurt out "Don't. I love you.Why can't it be me?" 

Past conversations are coming back - an interloping snippets of memories one after the other. And with heavy heart, I realized memories are all I have now. Tucked into the secret corners of my being. That sacred space you hold. Only you.

I am not sure if I'll ever get over you. If only I told you what I feel, would we end up together? But reality stares me in the face. And though, I'm breaking up inside I have to keep a brave face. The time has come to unchain my heart from yours.

So maybe one day, you'll know what I felt for you. You'll take hold of this letter where all my pent up emotions are written. Just like a message in a bottle ---- lost at sea.

I love you. Until we meet again. This time, I won't let you go.

image courtesy of weheartit.


  1. In the first place, why have you kept your silence if you think both of you had the same emotions towards each other? You have cradled all those questions in your minds and it remained there. Now, you're cradling the "what ifs". Man, that sucks.

    But I love this bittersweet love letter, She. It's just too painful...

    1. @he shoots: yep, a million times horrible decision. you know those fears to admit the obvious.... the odds to hurdle by getting into it... pero ganun naman yata jayv. you never really know the value of someone until you lose them.. until it is too late. thank you for the all time support ;)

  2. Replies
    1. @zaxdragon: it is sad... a sentiment of a heart so forlorn; too weak to fight for the one thing it prays so hard for... they say, there is no right or wrong to love, only the circumstances make it so.. there are a million of hearts in the world that are lonely; needing that someone to actually *see* and understand and reach out... Blessed be to you. Thank you for visiting my blog.

  3. My Reaction to it would say it, I guess. It is heartbreaking. Sad. I wonder how many love stories meet this end. Many, maybe.

    Turn back time!!! THAT is something I have thought about many a time. No love story there but the past is a place where we all find something that could be changed so that the present/future could be different. Sigh!

    1. @Vaishali: Turn back time. hmm how easily we drift into that wishful thinking. But if we turn back to that moment and change the order of things, aren't we tempting fate and re arranging the people and events. It's a chain reaction. You dip your hand in the water and it creates ripples.